Growing Up Good

I copied this post from the link below. I'm reposting it here because it gives me so much hope. (Much-needed hope!)
http://community.livejournal.com/library_mofo/1175117.html
-------

Non-mofo award
I've been meaning to mention this one for a while, but...

To the two-year-old twin girls who come in with their mom, so well-behaved, and clean up the children's area when they're finished playing, and always push in the chairs, and wait until we're done with the patron on the computer before showing us that wonderful book they found this time, that they're so excited about getting to read... Thank you. May you grow up just as wonderful as you are when you visit us...and just as generous.

We actually have a whole bunch of awesome little kids at work, but these two really take the cake. They came toddling in one day with their mom, nearly bouncing, and came up to return their books, and handed us a bag. Inside was the majority of their joint sticker collection. One of the things we've had to cut back on is fun kid-stuff, like coloring/activity pages, and the stickers the kids get at the end of their visit, at checkout. These two little girls visit with their mom regularly, and always ask for a sticker, like the other little ones...so they donated their sticker collection from birthdays and other presents so that everyone could still get one, when they come to the library.

Free Job

Have I told you that I finally got hired for a really cool job? I did. But they don't know for sure how they're going to pay me. It's an interesting conundrum. And the work has momentum that we all think is important to follow up on-- NOW. So basically, I'm looking for other sustaining part time work, and putting in some hours (which I track) on the awesome job, but trying not to work TOO MUCH until there is a secure source of funding...

I think it's time I got paid for at least SOME of the things I spend so much time working on.

The job? There's this farm. It's been owned/lived on by the same family since they got their land-grant for it back in 1848. The farm house that the final generation currently live in was built between 1848-1851. It is still a functional farm. (Now organic!) And they have archives of materials from their trip across the Oregon Trail to now. Archives that the Foundation (who are slowly taking responsibility for preserving the farm as a local historical treasure) would like to preserve, digitize, and then make available for educational purposes. And they've hired me.

IT's FRIGGEN AWESOME!!!

And to be fair, they did find a way to pay me for my work up to the 15th of this month. I think they're impressed that I got so much accomplished in only 19 hours-- and they begin to see the scope of what I can do for their goals... So they've put on my to-do list to research the process and rules for a non-profit Foundation to hire an employee. And to make a calendar of grant application due-dates for future fundraising efforts. I'll be writing the grants too, I suspect.

Should be fun.
And, like I said, I'm piecing together other more reliable work to fill the gaps in the meantime. Wish me luck. I need it.

Glossy

Today, I finally made an appointment with the volunteer business counselors at SCORE (yay free!), and applied for about four writing or researching -intensive jobs in town. It's been quite a day. I have to tell you, I'm frustrated with the online testing idea. It's a great idea, but the kind of people that test well with no context and no actual customer service skills? They aren't necessarily what I'd call a representative sampling of the exceptional customer service and networking crowd, doncha know.

Also, if I have to start over from scratch every time I try to click on something that isn't part of the "acceptable path to success" that they've mapped out one click at a time? They make you start over. Yeah. So the number of clicks seem to be on a golf scoring system-- anything above the proscribed number of clicks counts against you. Also, everything is timed.

I really wanted a moment of Godzilla-ness by the time I ran out of time for being online taking the damn test at the library, and had to log off, after only completing about five of the eight sections of testing for computer skills and speeds and program abilities-- for a CUSTOMER SERVICE JOB!!! And I still don't know who the employer is.

Yeah. In other news, I'm excited to meet with the small business dudes. They are both named David. They are worried that this will confuse me. They don't know anything about my specific "specialty" as they delicately put it, but they are willing to work with me on marketing it. And for all the irony in my blogger-voice, I really do appreciate their willingness to do so. I suspect that working with competent business dudes who are uncomfortable with alternative healing therapies will benefit me in several ways. First, anything THEY like, ANYBODY will like. Second, They'll really know what to avoid mentioning when I go on my quest for sponsorship and micro-loans. Third, they probably have CONNECTIONS.
Thank you, David.



Also, a possible apartment option has opened up near where I already live. And for about the combined price of my storage and current rent payments every month. There's definitely some potential there. AND the person who is moving out is a friend of mine, with cats. And she built them a window-deck for outdoor kitty viewing pleasure. Which she and the landlord will leave up for me, if I end up taking the space. (There is someone else with a one-day head start on the "I want that" process, but move-in isn't until December, and I've got awesome insider connections, so hey.)

Kudos, by the way, to this amazing nutritional booster juice called Ageless Extra. Taken daily, in small doses, it overcomes headcolds in a single leap! It provides boundless youthful energy when you forget to sleep! It slices, dices, and even fills in all the nutritional gaps in ANYBODY's diet-- making your body AND your mind regenerate faster, younger, smarter. (Now with gold body glitter and free tongue-piercing!!)

Okay, I lied about the body glitter. But it really does make a noticeable difference in the elasticity of my health, and my overall daily performance. And I digest it one hella-hundred percent better than any daily multivitamin I've ever tried. Dinner with friends on the nights I need to re-stock my supply is a welcome bonus.

OH-- and I am getting published in a nice little local seasonal newspaper called OpenWays. The issue they tell me I'm in comes out December 1st. Happy Winter, everybody!


....WHEEEEEE.....

Claw-Daddy!

So I was cruising around the Library Mo-Fo blog recently, and came across this little gem:
http://community.livejournal.com/library_mofo/799267.html

And it was just so well written that I had to share. I'm also a bit concerned.
I had this boss-- actually, I had four of this boss ALL AT THE SAME TIME...
And... well... it's just so SAD how many of us have had to work for this person at least once in our lifetime. What happened to good management training? What happened to good bosses and work environments that are not full of forced cheer? What happened to job security for the highly educated?!

It's funny-- in the comments there was a discussion about the need to never feel trapped in your job-- about how there are always better options out there and nobody should just PUT UP with a bad boss and an unappreciated professional life. This was countered by that realistic someone who recognized that yes- we are well-educated- and yes- it is never good to stay in a bad situation... but REALISTICALLY, it is not always possible to quit your job and find something better while maintaining all of your other responsibilities... like a marriage, a mortgage, and a MLS Repayment Plan... just for example.

But MAN did I love those truly devious examples of tenacity! I could definitely learn something from that popcorn kernel, that pebble in the shoe, that bird outside my window who ALWAYS starts chirping at 4am, regardless of the weather. In fact, it reminds me of one of my favorite quotes: "If you think being small makes you ineffectual, you have never been in bed with a mosquito!"

Meh.

I just finished pulling myself out of a slump, and just started actually being productive and proactive in my life again (I only slumped for about a week, but I still felt guilty about it)...
WHEN SUDDENLY

I found out that the one place I'd got an inside track for getting hired hadn't even selected me to go on to the final round of interviews, and has in fact hired someone else to fill the position at this time. (the one in Minnesota) Now, logically, I know I shouldn't expect to get hired for the first job I apply to, and I know I should view the one interview I did have with this University as "practice"... but man, Shoulds SUCK, and so did that bit of news this morning. It would be very easy to drown in a sea of shoulds without even realizing it was the weight of your own inner critic that made your boat unseaworthy in storms.

I'm what you'd call "proactive." So sitting here on my hands, watching life slip by, and feeling useless and pathetic and unemployed-- it's hard on my self-esteem. And my inner critic is having a field day. I know I'm smart. I know I'm intelligent, too. (not the same thing, really)--
and I know I have a lot to offer my future employers, and my future clients/patrons. I just don't know if I'll ever get the opportunity to prove it.

In the meantime, anybody have suggestions for good places 'round here'bouts to advertise my availability as a life coach and tarot reader? 'Cause, man, I could use some positive personal reinforcement in my personal abilities and in my pocket book. I don't even want to curl up and hide from the world anymore-- I want to go out and stranghle it. Or at least go out and prove that all the hard work I've put into turning my life around and starting over and getting my MLS and overcoming all those damn obstacles in the last three years-- was WORTH THE EFFORT, dammit!

And so I say again--
Meh.

Apple, Peaches, Pumpkin Pie...

Okay, so that was for counting down to the FINDING part of Hide-and-Seek... but Eeanie-Meeenie-Mynie-MOE was harder to spell. And really, I'm writing about choices.

To use LOL dialect:
Choices. I has dem.

And that is both more terrible and more wonderful than I could ever have imagined. You see, I'm job-hunting. I graduated, and unless I really want to rack up MORE student loans by going back to school AGAIN, this is my option. Job-hunting. Truthfully, I'm incredibly excited about having a job. As a Reference Librarian. That pays. Legally.

I've been living on loans and credit cards for a while now, and I'm really looking forward to getting them all paid off-- and doing it with real money that I actually EARNED MYSELF! And to top it all off, I love going into a library and knowing I belong there. Getting to wear the little tag (when I can find it) that tells people I actually have a RIGHT to offer them suggestions. Because, you know, I do it all the time anyway. In bookstores and train stations and shopping malls-- My friend, SLM, thinks we all have big blue signs on our foreheads that read "Information"... because even when we DON'T volunteer to help, we get asked. I guess we have that air of approachability mixed with a fine sense of capability or something... Kind of like a drunk on a bike. Nope, not driving... are you kidding? But still moving forward.

Ummm... okay, maybe not like a drunk on a bike.

The point is that I suddenly find myself with options. I'm getting interviews-- and follow-up interviews. I'm getting positive feedback, and if I cross my fingers (andmaybemytoes) and wiggle my nose, I might even get a job offer-- or two or three. And that means I get to decide if I want to be University or Public-oriented. And if I want to live in the Pacific Northwest, or if anyplace north of south will do. I get to decide where I live (sort of) and how I spend my new (upcoming, when I get a job) income. I get to decide what committees to join (usually-- some of them are automatic 'cause I'm the new guy and nobody else will take that one)... I have choices.

And it's scaring the be-jezus out of me.
How the hgell do I know???!

The one thing I HAVE figured out is that I'm going to have fun wherever I end up. Because I'll be a librarian, and because I'll have chosen that place for that period of time, and because I know how to make my own fun. I've managed to make any number of unsuitable jobs, work situations, living situations, and relationships work well past their go-bad-date. So one that actually suits me and feels good-- even if it isn't the BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME... Somehow I think it'll be okay. And THAT is a real relief.

I guess I'm choosing to succeed.
It feels good.
Scary-Good.

Without Wireless

Have you ever tried going without the internet for more than a day or two? I mean really-- no googlemaps to help you find the closest ATM or the nearest organic food market or Great Aunt Mabel's house since her directions were crap. No checking email, no blogging, no reading other peoples' blogs, no searching for jobs online, no searching for love online, no searching for a great deal online, no u-tube...

I mean, public libraries are great. They give you somewhere between 30 minutes and a whole hour of online time every day-- if you want to go to the library every day and do your work (and your confidential banking) on a public computer, in small chunks, if their software is compatible with what you need to get done.

So... my DSL was disconnected two weeks ago on Tuesday. And I ended up moving on that Friday. And on Sunday, we discovered that my lovely well-loved lovable computer HAD NO AIRPORT/WI-FI CARD IN IT.... so we ordered one. And it arrived on Saturday. On Sunday, we guessed at WEP passwords until the signal was established... and then rather than finally being off and running... we couldn't find any servers. WTF?

So today, we (this is the Royal We, by the way) called Customer Service. And discovered another more complex password. Which gave us BOTH a signal AND server access. I love technology. I love it even more when I have access to it.

Oh, and by the way, I love my new space. Even though I'll only be staying a couple of months. Happy February.

Dog Days of Winter

A snapshot of my day:

6am
Mrrrrt? ....Mrrrowwwrrr?
THUMP!

...Mrrrr?

6:45am
Something is staring at me. I can feel it, and it wakes me out of a dead and desperate last half-hour of sleep before the alarm goes off.
...oh. It's my cat. She wasn't sure if I was awake or asleep, so she came over to find out. Guess I'm awake now.

8:10am
Shgit! I turned off the alarm, and actually went back to sleep! With the cat!

9am
I call in to my internship to let them know I'm going to be late. This head cold is really slowing me down, and that extra hour of sleep didn't really help much. I can't call in to the library because it doesn't open until 10am. I email my supervisor. I take an expectorant because my ribs hurt from coughing, and this is supposed to help the coughs do their thing more easily.

10am
Yet another reason to demand truth in advertising. I have not stopped gut-wrenching coughing since I took the dagmn expectorant. I can't see straight to find my keys let alone drive to my internship. Guess I'll be later than I thought. (B-HH-HH-HH-CH-HH-*gasp .... cough-cough... BHHH-TOOOHHHH-HHHH-*gasp... blow nose, feel head pound, wait for next big coughing fit to-- BHH-TOOOHHHH-cough-HHHHH)... I think I just gave myself a nose bleed.

11am
Grab 2 skeins of yarn to return to store, along with receipt. Put cell phone in purse. Put on Volunteer Badge. Grab lunch leftovers. Grab warm coat. Grab list of Practicum Goals from start of semester. Grab cat as she slides out the door. Start driving to internship. Dog in road. Lean black dog with collar and mange. Dog looks both ways, crosses in front of me since I've stopped. Dog gets out of road, I drive on.

11:30am
I arrive at my internship. I finish up a few final projects for various librarians. I get some interview advice. I look over my original goals and see what really happened here...

12:30pm
I leave for another local library branch, where we are having our monthly Youth Services Meeting. I realize that I've forgotten my purse. At home.

3:30pm
My coughing is so bad again that I leave the meeting early. I decide to head home for cough medicine and my purse, and then jet back to the library for the last hour of my internship.

4:15pm
Traffic is bad, too. And there's another dog in the road. Same road. I stop for it. A dalmatian this time, also with a collar (but no mange). This dog is stupid, but nice. It trots down the road in front of me. It stays in my lane. It makes good time. I put on my blinkers and roll along behind it. Someone in a parking lot sees the dog. It's her dog. She comes across the road to get the dog. The dog lets itself get got. I start driving again, and I turn off my blinkers.

4:30pm
I'm not going to make it back for that last hour of my internship, I might as well stay home. (cough, hack, wheeze, moan) Oh, look. Here's my purse. Hanging from it's hook as usual. At home.

...Mrrow?

Moment of the Day

No shigt, there I was. (That's how all good Army stories start. Makes you want to hear what's going to happen next, doesn't it?) Sitting behind the Reference Desk at the Unnamed Public Library, observing Reference Services in action.

On one side, young guy, quiet voice, girlfriend hiding around the corner:
"Do you guys have the Kamga Sugtra?"
On the other side, mature mother with 8-year-old daughter peering anxiously around Mom's elbow:
"Where do you keep the Frog and Toad stories?"
The juxtaposition of those two requests (and the stages in life of the people making them) was priceless.

I just love the Reference Desk. I really do. Today, among our other requests, we also had one for the history of bread making, one for books about Thunder and Lightning for toddlers (somebody got scared), and a woman who hadn't used her library card in over five years, but really really wanted to check out Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. We also discovered that we have NO books about spiders in stock, and only one children's fact book on mosquitos. It was a sad day for somebody. Also, I discovered that ALL the copies of The Princess Diaries, vol. 1, are checked out until doom's day, or the day after. I have to read it before our next Teen Council meeting, by popular choice, no less. That's going to be fun. Oh, and apparently the third book in some Violent Fantasy series for pre-teens is due out soon, and nobody quite knows when. Solution?
Ask Reference.

And lets not for get that the crazy man wanted to have a staring contest (which we've all been warned NOT TO DO with this particular crazy. Seriously. As soon as they saw him coming, the closest librarian turned to me and said, "Don't make eye contact with this one. He's bad-crazy.") so he made kissy noises at all the women behind the desk until our WONDERFUL security officer of the day came back inside, and crazy man left. Apparently, the crazy man is still smart and sane enough not to cause trouble in front of a cop. Who, by the way, had just finished dealing with another crazy person (female this time) who'd been harassing patrons on their way into the library.
Wednesday is crazy people day.

So yeah. Just another day at the office.
How was yours?

....You know... In retrospect, it occurs to me that some smart producer will eventually realize that libraries are NOT boring, and all the insane stories we librarians have amassed over the years and years and years we've been working with THE PUBLIC (all of it) will finally have an OUTLET. Can you imagine how FUNNY and yet Reality TV Bazarre a sitcom could be if it were based around all the stuff that happens around the Reference Desk at a busy library? I mean-- we've got rebellious teens trying to shock us by asking for info about occult magic (Yes, that section is HERE, and we've got some great websites to suggest as well. Have you read anything by Scott Cunningham yet?); and we've got elderly ladies learning to use computers so they can do online dating; and we've got the little angelic boy who keeps finding new and inventive ways to jam the printer... There is even a whole genre of librarian humor devoted to different terms and best locations for "doing it" in the stacks, you know. And we've found the dirty condgoms to prove it, thank you very much.

That's not even MENTIONING all the drama and hilarity of filming the librarians themselves. How about the 5foot tall ex-rugby player with her dog's footprint tattooed on her back? And the old-school reference lady who turns off her hearing aid when she doesn't feel like helping people? And the ex-Secret Service guy who left Government work and went into on-call reference services at the public library, but likes to act tough and tell war stories from Desert Storm (he wasn't ever officially there, you know) around the few male librarians we've managed to hire...

What about old what's-her-name who accidentally left behind forty-one pairs of black pumps when she retired? (We're still not sure what she wore home from work on those particular days.) Or Henry, who up until a year or two ago, was both head of a well-known Academic Library, and one of the best-loved down hill ski coaches (not to mention his hobby of white-water rafting!) ever. Oh, and that hot children's librarian from Europe, with the cute little accent and the cute little buns... Too bad he's married... And I don't think you could pay me enough to wear those two 8-foot tall cat costumes that require someone else to lead you around because you can't really see out of them... But yet those two cats are seen at every ALA conference, bumbling around after cute library geeks whenever they find one...

I tell you, a sitcom based on library world would strike PAY DIRT. Nobody could make up some of the stories we've got to tell! And believe it or not, I have personally met every one of those librarians previously mentioned. And most of the patrons, too. I have yet to find a condgom, but I know people who have, and I did once find a squatter in the library at closing time. He'd set up his tent back in the Government Documents section, correctly assuming that nobody goes there if they can help it, and was preparing a wiener dog over a propane burner for his dinner when I passed by. I still can't believe the fire alarm didn't go off.
But then... you know my opinion of fire alarms.

YAY!

So I did my first official library event today-- my first all by myself not at the library event, that is. And I think it was a success. I feel good. And thank goodness a couple of volunteers showed up to help! I hope I didn't take over too much, because I was SO glad to have more than just me at that table. Especially with all the little kids using glue at the same time!

We made puppets. We colored in big bubble letters. We stuck stickers everywhere. And we handed out info on age-appropriate books and the Unknown Public Library. We also got to pet a turtle and a hedgehog, watch the hula dancers, and stay dry in the rain while the orchestra performed. Free face painting, too. What could be better on a Sunday afternoon?!

Oh, and I even got to read one of the storytime stories I'd brought-- to an audience of one freaked out little kindergartener, and his grateful teenage cousin. It was a definite success.

Now I just have to muster enough energy to do my homework. Riiiight.

Eat a Lime!

I'm not always a fan of following fads-- I mean, let's face it. I waited two years to get my first stretch pants in middle school, and by then they were going out of style. Of course, mine were yellow with leopard print on them, so if I'd held on to them for another decade or two, I'd actually have been in style again... And I can't honestly tell if that's sorta cool, or really really scary.

But anyway, this post is about Pirates. I definitely loved Johnny Depp's performance in Pirates of the Caribbean. And when I heard about "Talk Like a Pirate Day" on the radio, I thought that was pretty cool, and I laughed about it quite a bit, too. But there is a house on my street that has enclosed the front porch with large pirate flags, posted a sign across the front of the house proclaiming it a Pirate's Nest, and they use this as an excuse not to mow the weeds in the front lawn. They also don't shave much, and BO is, of course, a natural part of a pirate's life, so to be authentic, they don't seem to shower much. That's a bit too much pirate for me. That's when the term "fad" starts to mean "foolish and dumb" in my little book of words. And I wasn't so keen on the sequel and prequel movies, either. One good pirate movie was enough.

So I'd sorta decided the whole Pirate thing just wasn't for me. And then there was the Pirate Car, with the drunk and half-naked copilot wearing ratty breaches, an eye patch and a sword... ran into them one day getting gas for my car. They were trying to have a deep philosophical conversation about discrimination against pirates, but the drunk guy kept losing track of his sentences and hiccuping and stuff.
Yeah... No.

But that was before I discovered Captain Bogg and Salty. Now, I crave a bumper sticker, a t-shirt, and a CD. In that order. Just listen to the song about Scurvy! and I think maybe you'll be a convert, too. And even if you're not in on this particular local fad... I guarantee you'll smile about the limes, the bunny rabbit, and the rum. Don't ask. Just visit the website, and click on "Warm Up Podcast" on the far right in the middle, scroll down to Scurvy! and turn up the volume. Aarrrrr!

Migrant Birds

Spent two hours on a Migrant Farm handing out free children's books (mostly written in Spanish) and trying to understand Spanish as it was spoken today. Had to thank my ex for taking every opportunity to speak Spanish to other Spanish speakers-- I'm actually practiced at trying to understand a full-speed conversation from the few words I can recognize. And the more I listened, the more words I remembered (basic ones like Gracias and La Biblioteca and los libros-- books).

It was hot, dusty, and challenging, and I am TOTALLY EXHAUSTED. I can't imagine what it must be like for the farm workers-- most of whom do not speak any English-- to deal with these conditions-- including the lack of language skills-- every day! We went with a great group of dedicated people who brought free clothes and free food and ice cream for the kids. They offer to help people fill out forms, and they provide domestic violence intervention. The volunteers all speak Spanish, and all they want is to help their fellow people who are new to America to find her many opportunities.

I also realized that I'd been so nervous and scared about doing this because I viewed migrant workers as "those strange beings" who had nothing to do with me or my life. The thing is-- they are just normal people trying to get through their day. The clothes they wear are like ours because they are the clothes we outgrew or stopped liking and donated somewhere. These people we met with took great pride in their appearance, and many looked cleaner, and more slick than I did by a long-shot-- since I was hot, dusty, tired, and I just don't seem to control my hair very well at the best of times.

The teen aged girls had cliques and insider comments to make to each other. The little toddlers just wanted your full attention and as many books as they could hold. The parents and adult workers just wanted a little extra to put aside for hard times, or a special treat for their kids-- and free is a very good price. Just normal people.

And we didn't go to Tumbucktoo to see them, either. We went to the corner of two main streets-- where they meet about a mile from the center of town. It's the outskirts, but definitely not the boonies. There were still fences with lawns and shrubs on both sides of the street. And then we turned in to a gravel drive. There was a guard who had to approve our entry. He did this by glaring at us as we drove past, and then waving an arm at the parking area where we were supposed to set up our stuff.

So I'm glad I went. And I want to go again. But I also feel even more strongly about taking those Conversational Spanish classes as soon as I graduate. I have a lot to learn about my fellow wo/man. I think maybe we all do.